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| Leagues Cup, in human form. |
That approximates my annual experience with Leagues Cup: a bunch of strangers dropping in to the familiar, interpretable world of the MLS regular season, thereby detouring into some wacky side quest. And it only means something to the team/couple that walks away with the trophy, whether in metal or human form.
Portland Timbers 1-0 Queretaro FC
About the Game
When halftime rolled around and the broadcast got to showing the first half highlights, they started with a wildly overcooked cross that capped one of the rare competent attacking sequences managed by either team. They had a goal to show, of course – a bumbler scored by Cristhian Paredes through a thicket of flailing legs and falling bodies (and that link may or may not take you to it) – but the final stats speak to how little happened before and after. Jonathan Perlaza got sent off for a foul and a fit just before the halftime whistle and that left nothing but the struggle to stay awake through the second half.
Near as I can tell, Queretaro came to defend and without any form of an actionable Plan B. The 0.3 xG awarded to them in the official line matches the eye test…wish I could say the same about the 1.6 they handed Portland, because that would have hit like Red Bull and Everclear compared to what I watched.
That’s all I have on the game and I’ve already exhausted my knowledge of Queretaro. Now, to entertain some, but not all of the thoughts I had as I watched. [Ed. – The Plan is to pare the thoughts down to five for all future posts – and the length of the posts along with ‘em.]
Five Thoughts I Had While Watching
1) Can the Timbers Win This Thing?
I mean, does any other question matter about a sexy single of a tournament shoehorned into the middle of an endless season? After two games played, your Portland Timbers currently stand atop the MLS side of the standings for the 2025 Leagues Cup (Note: that link will be irrelevant by end of day). Six MLS teams have yet to play their second game – a cohort that includes a Seattle Sounders team with enough padding in their goal differential to leap-frog the Timbers if they win their Game 2 – but that still means 11 other MLS teams have played two games and they’re all still below Portland. The second cohort (i.e., the teams that have played two games) includes 2025 heavies like Minnesota, Columbus, and way, way down there on zero points and no hope, San Diego FC. Strong start by Portland, in other words, and few things sell me faster on any team in a single-elimination tournament than a sturdy defense. and the Timbers have three straight clean sheets in all competitions. There’s one more high hurdle left to clear – i.e., the fact that just four teams of the 18 from each league make the quarterfinals – but Portland has done exactly what they need to so far…
2) But Is It More Them Than Us?
I didn’t have time to take in Portland’s more impressive* 4-0 win over Atletico San Luis, but I’d put Queretaro’s resistance to last night’s result somewhere around the level of a blacked-out drunk lamely struggling against being rolled into the ditch. (* While I watched the highlights for the San Luis game, I hadn't checked the stats until now…were the Timbers just crazy efficient that night?) That begs the question of how much the Timbers owe that first-place perch to the benefit of the draw, i.e., are they playing the dregs of Liga MX? I’d appreciate insights from anyone who watched the San Luis win – feel free to comment below, or reply to the skeet when it goes up on Bluesky – but suspect we’ll get an answer when the Timbers travel to Austin to play Club America Wednesday night.
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| Same, Grogoo (sp?). Same. |
Watching a tournament where every game matters – even with a grabastic mess of a set up – has been refreshing. Knowing that six points might not be enough to qualify Portland for the quarterfinals? EXQUISITE! I know that MLS Brass will never go for it, but I’d love to see the league switch to an Apertura/Clausura format (which comes in several varieties) that gives every team two (to three) bites per year at a trophy, while having about half as many teams qualify for the playoffs. Breaking the league into three conferences would be a necessary adjustment (to keep a lid on the number of games), but having a second opportunity at fewer slots at the end of a shorter season would feel as fresh and new as opening up a marriage. After two score and five years of following MLS, I long to feel anything more than the flutter I get from a game well-played during the months of July, August and September…it’s enough to make one wonder if that wasn’t the inspiration for the Leagues Cup (while strong suspecting that gives MLS Brass far too much credit).
4) A Good Kind of Threat
I appreciate that external reasons played some role in deciding who started last night – e.g., David Da Costa’s shoulder(?), Santiago Moreno’s…something or another, and Antony’s long-term injury – but it was also good to see, say, Ariel Lassiter take all (or nearly all) the freekicks last night and Omir Fernandez do his usual buzzing around (and inviting kicks to his ankles that lead to frustration that lead to second yellow cards). While I doubt anything that happened last night will upset the current pecking order, I see the same message that both players send to the regular starters ahead of them: “I may or may not have your talent, but I will outwork you.” I don’t get the sense that Lassiter has many fans, but he delivers a competent free kick (even if he floats them more than I like) and he provides more effective width than the Timbers get out of any of the regulars – including Antony, and I think he’s actually valuable in that sense. Fernandez faces more competition – like almost every other Timbers midfielder, he seems more comfortable playing inside – but the more sweat they can squeeze out of the players in front of them, the better.
5) The Mystery That Is Cristhian Paredes
With no disrespect to the player intended, I have no idea 1) how Paredes has stayed with the Timbers for as long as he has (since 2018, for reference), and 2) when he played 10,638 minutes for Portland – and that’s just regular season minutes (maybe? I don’t know how the count his official numbers and don’t need to find out for the sake of this argument). I can’t think of a time when he has been The Man at any given position and he isn’t the best at any particular skill required for his position – e.g., he’s more hassler than strong tackler, if he has a “killer pass” in his toolkit, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him take it out, and he threatens to score with the frequency of a stopped clock. This doesn’t double as a call to boot him off the roster – bet there are at least 25 other “Paredeses” currently toiling in MLS – but watching him this season, in particular, has only deepened the mystery.
With apologies for talking more about the tournament than the local team, that’s it for this one. Looing forward to feeling something once again on Wednesday. Till then…
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