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| Perfection is perfection, Mike Brady. |
Major League Soccer’s offseason has lasted long enough for
me. With an eye to keeping limber and toned, I’ll be tracking the league the
same way I always do: once a week and from somewhere between a bird’s eye view
and an airplane flight path. I will drill down on Thing 1 (Portland Timbers)
and Thing 2 (FC Cincinnati) when there’s something to talk about with either –
more on that below – but I’ll never see enough about any of the other teams to go
granular on them. Fair warning.
Whether this starts a tradition or steps off from the wrong foot,
I’m going to talk about MLS as a whole first – not least because the main point
there applies to every team in MLS, including Thing 1 and Thing 2. (No, I’ll
stop that right now…and has anyone ever done a version of that using penises
for the “things”?)
When I read through (most of) Matt Doyle’s (aka, The
Armchair Analyst’s) 2018 Global Review (which takes some time), two loose
concepts kept surfacing: first, and most important, it gets a little easier
every season for teams to lose touch with the pack in MLS, never mind the
leaders; think your pudgier cyclists during the Tour de France. For those who
journey through Doyle’s Labyrinth, you won’t read a naked and proud positive
about any team until you get to the Number 18 spot (of 23 MLS teams), where he
notes that Mauro Manotas balled out for the Houston Dynamo in 2018, scoring 25
goals across all competitions. The teams below Houston’s playoff-dodging squad
are 2018’s pudgy cyclists – e.g., your San Jose Earthquakes, Orlando City SCs,
the Colorado Rapids, the Chicago Fire, Toronto FC – the squads who put one foot
in front of the other here and there last season, but never enough to really be part of the
playoff conversation. Doyle used a really clean call-response to sum up
Orlando’s season, but the same applied to them all (and Houston, honestly, and
probably Minnesota United FC too):
“DISAPPOINTMENT: The whole season, really.”
Still, one team underlines the point about falling behind
better than the rest: San Jose. They ended 2018 the worst team in MLS, none of
their signings returned on investment, the head coach, Mikael Stahre, never
really settled in and got yanked before the end of the season (having built no
confidence), and Chris Wondolowski aged another year. Shit was bleak, basically,
even if admirably scrappy. San Jose also won the Supporters’ Shield in 2012
with a sound defense and a set of brawlers for forwards. The league moved on,
the ‘Quakes fell behind, and, despite some effort (but….the world’s longest
outdoor bar?!), they haven’t yet figured out how to catch up. Every team in MLS:
This could be you. You don’t want this to be you, so don’t let it be you.
The second point relates to that: under every team, Doyle
has a category under every team name titled, “Players to Build on in 2019” –
aka, the base potential within the current roster. Different ideas catch the
light as you hold each roster to the light – for instance, Montreal has this to
reckon with: “[Ignacio] Piatti, at age 34, has said he will be having his last
MLS season. There is real urgency to get it done this year” – but a lot of them
point to the nebulous issue of the precise meaning of the phrase(s) “build on”
or “build around.” Piatti is a special case – i.e., more fun than a barrel of
drunken monkeys and he has won games on his own – but, when you talk about
“building on” Piatti, you’re talking about trying to give the team one more
shot at glory while he’s still on the roster. Without regard to how it happens,
there will be a before and an after with a singular (for MLS) talent like Piatti,
and that will more than likely force a change in style. The same goes when you
talk about “building on” Bastian Schweinsteiger for Chicago.
I didn’t get all that excited about any teams’ base
potential until Real Salt Lake at #12. Here’s who Doyle suggested they build
on:
“AM Albert Rusnak, W Jefferson Savarino, W Corey Baird, MF
Damir Kreilach, RB Brooks Lennon.”
For as much as he struggled, I’d throw Justen Glad on that
pile (because he’s like, 5-years-old), but, because those reasonably talented
players are also reasonably young, that makes this a conversation about building instead of sticking in some spare parts to get another year out of,
say, Piatti or Schweinsteiger (or the Los Angeles Galaxy’s Zlatan Ibrahimovic).
Moreover, the real question for one of those “spare parts” team is whether
they’ve mapped out some kind of future after that one irreplaceable player gets
replaced by age, injury, or one of those wild locker room meltdowns that you
secretly hope happens to your team, because epic cat-fights are epic.
That’s if for the MLS general stuff for now - I’ll wrap up
with some further MLS league-wide notes (as well as a stray comment about the
U.S Men’s National Team) below – but, by now, I’ve tried the patience of anyone
who’s hear for chatter about the Timbers or FC Cincinnati. Timbers people will
have to wait a little longer, because I have to start this with my notes on FC
Cincinnati…and that’s because I never had a chance to say goodbye.
FC Cincinnati RIGHT NOW
I still haven’t seen FC Cincinnati lose a game. I’m not
kidding. I missed the loss to New York Red Bulls II in the USL 2018
post-season, the game that closed the chapter on FC Cincy’s brief, meteoric run
through America’s second flight. I almost went back to watch the replay, only
to discover that ESPN+ pulls the plug on its archives (and, following the
logic, their own grandmothers) as soon as they think no one will notice. While
I can’t call myself thankful for the omission, it saved two hours and saved me
from some pointless commentary. Bottom line: whatever caused that loss stopped
mattering the second the final whistle blew.
There’s an old episode of TV somewhere in the world where
some kid’s parent tries to con him/her with a new goldfish to replace an
original goldfish that died because…fuck it, it’s a goldfish, moving on. In the
relevant sitcom/drama (or just The Simpsons) the kid totally notices the
replacement because that kid knows that fish down to the. last. fucking. scale.
because. love. And I felt a little like that with FC Cincinnati, 1.0, the
Only One I Knew. I only started watching the team play back in June of their
2018 season, so that’s the sample with which I’m working. Because I never saw
them lose, it got to the point where I wondered whether FC Cincy could
lose. They did, obviously, and that returns matters back to my original
question about the team: what happens when they step up to Major League Soccer?
As I’ve been watching FC Cincinnati sign and, where
appropriate, add players in the 2018-19 MLS off-season, one major thing stood
out. And it starts here:
“A Major League Soccer club's active roster is comprised of
up to 30 players.”
FC Cincinnati has only 20 players on its roster so far (now 21), leaving them nine short of the limit. And, before going any further, I
want to make one thing absolutely clear: I will never learn the ins & outs
of Major League Soccer’s rules for team rosters. I could also learn Esperanto,
but that’s just self-improvement kitsch; I am very much an end-product user, almost
a purist, which means I care only, and exclusively, about what happens on the
field every match-day; everything else is just “what ifs” and “counter-factuals.”
Fans don’t get input on scouting or squad selection; it is served to us every
Saturday, Sunday or slightly-less-well attended midweek match; it is ours to
observe and cheer…and it only now occurs to me how well spectator sports have
prepared us all for life in an authoritarian state...never mind, smiles back
on…smiles, smiles everyone. Smiling? Very good…
This team needs work, obviously, more depth in central
defense, and more depth generally. And I wonder if that isn’t where the fun
begins. To rephrase the eternal question from 2018, how many of the players who
came up from the USL are week-in, week-out starters in Major League Soccer? A
couple players look promising by either resume or track record with FC Cincy
1.0, but the question of whether they’ll level up (for the USL guys) or adjust
(for the imports) will remain open till…oh, 10-12 weeks into the 2019 MLS regular season, aka, showtime. To give
a rough count of the better potential from MLS Week 1, I’d include the
following (with caveats): Fanendo Adi, Fatai Alashe(?), Leonardo Bertone(?),
Mathieu Deplagne(promising?), Greg Garza, Alvas Powell, Forrest Lasso (I have no
questions here, and I feel OK), Emanuel Ledesma (ditto?), Victor Ulloa, Kendall
Waston (call him “yes,” but). Oh, and I have full faith and confidence that FC
Cincy is solid at goalkeeper, but, yeah, that roster doesn’t scream Atlanta United
FC 2017, at least not yet. Does it whimper Minnesota United FC? I really don’t
think so, but – and I mean this from the bottom of my bitter heart – that’s why
they play the games, right?
With all the questions in play, I’m going sit on final
judgment on FC Cincy’s chances until it gets its full, 100%-roster in place. In
the here and now, I just want to emphasize the stuff up top about falling
behind. Unless FC Cincinnati either adds a one or two clear quality players
between now and kick-off, or fills out the depth the right way (from whatever
source; I’m both very open-minded and results-oriented), I will worry about a
lost year for the team.
The good news is, they are trying. Trading to get Greg Garza
shows real intent and having a scouting network pick up prospects like Bertone and Deplagne shows some promise. The big caution there comes with all
the screw-ups, expensive and otherwise, I’ve seen over my (too) many years of
following MLS. Never call a player successful till he’s successful in MLS. Legends have failed in this league, even if aging ones. On the plus side,
awkward longshots have gone on to be kings and legends. So apply your dreams
appropriately and without prejudice, because the dice will show what they will.
And, to close out this section, I didn’t know a team could have
an official chili (and I don’t like what Lasso is doing in that picture), but I
understand completely why FC Cincy does.
Portland Timbers RIGHT NOW
“It was a very emotional meeting. It was very upsetting. I
think everyone walked away from it realizing how special Alvas is, as a person,
and how much he means to the group and the locker room. It’s probably one of
the hardest meetings I’ve ever had to be a part of.”
The tragic became official today when the Timbers finally completed the long-rumored move that sent Alvas Powell to FC Cincinnati. The
shot he posted to twitter was more than enough to make me feel for the guy, but
I’ve always liked Powell, if only generally. I’m probably the last Timbers fan to see that quote, or even
read the article with which it’s associated. MLSSoccer.com posted that almost
immediately after the Timbers’ MLS Cup loss and it had a surprisingly newsy detail
at the heart of it given how it bordered on talking ill of the dead (I mean,
they’d just suffered a literal loss):
“We are looking to strengthen in three to four positions,
and that does provide more competition for places.”
That quote came from the love/hate center of the Timbers front office,
Gavin Wilkinson, either warning some players to check their shoulders or just talking big. Then again, his 3-4 positions sounds about right after a
season when only two Timbers – Diego Chara at Box-to-Box Jesus and Sebastian
Blanco at…sure, winger - made Bobby Warshaw’s (or anyone else’s) list of top players in MLS for 2018. Without thoroughly re-litigating the final, I expect Portland
to look for: options in central defense, which was more solid than strong last season; I
can’t help but think that, with Powell gone the team needs cover at
fullback; I’d argue that something is mandatory at forward; and, personally, I
want strong understudies for either, or both Chara and Diego Valeri, and I say
that knowing full well that watching both those guys retired could very well be Shane riding off into the sunset combined with the emotional impact of the end
of Old Yeller. Surrogate dad might not come back is what I’m saying...
At time of typing, I count 33 current Portland Timbers –
that’s everyone listed here, minus Powell. (Just don’t…I’ll start again.) I’m
not sure how many of the rest of those players will return for 2019, and the
lazy google search I just attempted is all the effort I intend to put into it (“Timbers
Players 2019 contract"; as I said, I’m an end-product guy), but, by memory, I
only recall the following as potential-to-likely departures: Samuel
Armenenteros, Roy Miller, and Liam Ridgewell. I suspect a lot more guys are
vulnerable under the guidelines Wilkinson just laid down – e.g., Jack Barmby,
Steve Clark, Andres Flores, Lawrence Olum, and…I dunno, maybe that prioritizes
getting someone to help Chara in order to free Andy Polo to be Andy Polo, and that begs
questions of either Cristhian Paredes or, to name one guy I know not one thing
about, Renzo Zambrano…
…just to note it, never come to this site to stay current. I
lag, both in general and as a rule.
When I cast my gaze over this lightly-bloated roster, I see
more hangers-on surrounded in question marks than a lot of your more engaged
Timbers fans. To name the relevant hangers-on, what’s the long-term plan with,
say, Victor Arboleda, Tomas Conechny, Marvin Loria, Zambrano, or, one guy who
impressed me on the rare occasions I’ve watched him, Eryk Williamson? My sense
of what this team needs to do kinda hangs on the hangers-on. For instance, I remember seeing
the report on signing Zambrano and Loria a week (or thereabouts) after MLS Cup, but
does Loria coming up, along with (maybe) Armenteros sticking around and Jeremy
Ebobisse (please!) getting his game to weekly starter put an end to the search
for padding at forward?
God’s honest truth, I have no idea what to expect from the
Timbers this offseason – and I say that even as I’m perilously close to certain about what to expect from Portland’s 2019 season, e.g.,
another run on the Big Three (Chara, Blanco and Valeri, plus everyone else able
to come along). And, full disclosure, I’ll worry about injury/slippage from any
of those three until 2019 officially ends, because that’s just what I do. That
said, and to state a preference…
If there’s enough talent in the current, surprisingly large quorum
of under-25 players on Portland’s roster, I’d eat a dreaded “transition year”
in 2019 if it lays a foundation for longer-term success – or even potential success – over some
kind of 5-Year Plan. I’m also ruthless to the point of callousness to feel fine
about arguing that, in the event of any doubts about those players, go out and
get any and all players you trust to perform in order to make the most of a last chance with the Big Three.
As for what Portland will actually do, trading Powell for $250K in GAM might tip the
hand on a little. I don’t expect a wholesale promotion of the
under-25 class, in other words; I would be delighted, though, to see two-three
graduations. And, by translation, to see the Timbers dump whatever dead-weight
they can. Again, I’m weak on roster mechanics, they’re getting paid to read
Hindu-Farsi, I’m not, etc., but, in that caveated-to-death context, this sounds
like a great idea:
“If we were to move Lucas Melano into a TAM spot – which
would happen, should we sign a DP – then we’re able to strengthen the group
again.”
OK, that’s both it and plenty. I don’t think any of the
future posts about this stuff will go on nearly as long, but I’m notorious for
lack of restraint. I expect to post something weekly, either Saturday or
Sunday, until the season kicks off. Oh! The random news I’ve seen. Just real
quick…
MLS-Wide
Damn both my eyes and my tongue, but I liked the changes MLS
made to the 2019 playoffs. If the league insists on playoffs, condensing them
to keep the pitch fevered is the least they can do. Though I will miss the
magically clunky mechanics of the two-leg, road-goal scenario…just so much
quirk to that competitive mutation.
U.S. Men’s National Team
The fact that I can’t remember the last time I wrote about
the U.S. Men (which, for the record, was once my North (Fucking) Star) gets at
how thoroughly alienating I found the Jurgen Klinsmann Years. For the record,
it was neither the results nor the on-field confusion that lost me, but Dear
Jurgen’s maddening habit of throwing everyone but himself under the bus that
made the whole damn thing so sickening…
…anyway, I’m intrigued to see what Gregg Berhalter brings to
U.S. Soccer. I’m also really pleased to see the U.S. choose Costa Rica and
Panama as their opponents for putting a cap on January camp. I didn’t buy the “best
competition in the world crap” for long (though I did buy it), because the road
the U.S. has to navigate to reach the World Cup goes through CONCACAF, and nowhere
else. Glamour isn’t always good, and it’s spelled “glamor,” goddammit.
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