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| Yessir, it's been that kind of year. |
I hadn’t planned on writing about this game, but I had an hour to kill between games yesterday, so what the hell? Also, I’m barely writing about FC Cincinnati’s 0-2 road loss to Atlanta United FC so much as I’m writing about the season as a whole and state of things generally. Which makes sense because what was last night’s game but a 90-minute microcosm of the season and state of things as a whole?
Cincinnati went down one goal early - and under the weight of…was that just three attacking players for Atlanta? - something that’s proved fatal nearly every time it’s happened. That’s just what happens for any team that’s scored just five goals in sixteen games. That’s right: Cincinnati’s attack hasn’t even arrived at a point where I can start to use actual numbers when I write about them - e.g., it’s “five” instead of “5,” or, God forbid, “16” or, dare I orgasm mid-preamble by typing “30”?
Atlanta scored again, Cincinnati never did, the end. Point to anything in the box score - e.g., the Orange and Blue’s lopsided edge in possession and passing accuracy, their stockpile of passes, the fact they held the edge in every available attacking category - and I’ll point to the scoreboard. Cincinnati’s attackers gave Brad Guzan a little work to do, but, to get all existential about it, I can’t remember the last time I tuned into an FC Cincinnati game without expecting unbelievable, unrelenting tragedy. It’s not whether they’ll fail, but how long we’ll have to wait for it to become the familiar, sickening combination of both obvious and final. Atlanta did all concerned a solid by scoring their second by the 26th minute (and tough night for Kendall Waston). Anyone clear on why Jaap Stam swapped out Nick Hagglund, when central defense was working better than most things?
The only question left open for me in 2020 - that’s to say, yes, I think that FC Cincinnati 2020’s team will go down as the shittiest attacking team in MLS history (they have to score four goals to avoid that fate) - is which players the team holds onto going forward. I’ll tick through tonight’s starters and subs below - and, to be clear, this is an entirely ruthless and mercenary exercise, done without regard to how much turnover any given team can withstand, or even the realities of any player’s existing and legally binding contract, e.g., if Cincinnati’s contractually-bound to keep that player around, it is what it is. With that, here’s who I’d keep and who’d I’d cut bait on listed in the order they appear in the box score (don’t read into the order, basically):
Cincinnati went down one goal early - and under the weight of…was that just three attacking players for Atlanta? - something that’s proved fatal nearly every time it’s happened. That’s just what happens for any team that’s scored just five goals in sixteen games. That’s right: Cincinnati’s attack hasn’t even arrived at a point where I can start to use actual numbers when I write about them - e.g., it’s “five” instead of “5,” or, God forbid, “16” or, dare I orgasm mid-preamble by typing “30”?
Atlanta scored again, Cincinnati never did, the end. Point to anything in the box score - e.g., the Orange and Blue’s lopsided edge in possession and passing accuracy, their stockpile of passes, the fact they held the edge in every available attacking category - and I’ll point to the scoreboard. Cincinnati’s attackers gave Brad Guzan a little work to do, but, to get all existential about it, I can’t remember the last time I tuned into an FC Cincinnati game without expecting unbelievable, unrelenting tragedy. It’s not whether they’ll fail, but how long we’ll have to wait for it to become the familiar, sickening combination of both obvious and final. Atlanta did all concerned a solid by scoring their second by the 26th minute (and tough night for Kendall Waston). Anyone clear on why Jaap Stam swapped out Nick Hagglund, when central defense was working better than most things?
The only question left open for me in 2020 - that’s to say, yes, I think that FC Cincinnati 2020’s team will go down as the shittiest attacking team in MLS history (they have to score four goals to avoid that fate) - is which players the team holds onto going forward. I’ll tick through tonight’s starters and subs below - and, to be clear, this is an entirely ruthless and mercenary exercise, done without regard to how much turnover any given team can withstand, or even the realities of any player’s existing and legally binding contract, e.g., if Cincinnati’s contractually-bound to keep that player around, it is what it is. With that, here’s who I’d keep and who’d I’d cut bait on listed in the order they appear in the box score (don’t read into the order, basically):
