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| Exciting. |
Week 8 has already kicked off, by now, but there's plenty of MLS soccer ahead this weekend. Topping the bill this weekend, The Only Game That Matters, The Thrilla in Vanilla, yep, that's right, Seattle Sounders FC v. Portland Timbers.
And, to all those other rivalries out there, you're doing it wrong. (Kidding (inspired by #3). I enjoy everything about Seattle v. Portland, but I couldn't give less of a shit about that stuff.)
With that out of the way, it’s preview time.
Seattle Sounders FC v. Portland Timbers
For starters, the gap between how I see the Portland Timbers and how other (maybe) smart(er), and definitely better-connected observers see them has the noodles that make up my brain unraveling a little. The team I watched fumbled all over that tiny Yankee Stadium pitch with all the grace and confidence of a teenage boy (or me) trying to undo a bra (look, it's not my long suit). Portland eventually got to what NYCFC couldn't – e.g. bumbling the ball over the line – so they won. Even the one thing the Timbers did well didn't look so graceful. Yeah, yeah, Adam Kwarasey won Save of the Week (start watching about 1:10 in there). I mean, that's a no-look save in the end (the vote is rigged; stupid democracy). The man flinched. (Not judging; I would have flinched and squealed.)
While not everyone saw the game - and see the Timbers' season as a whole - differently, enough people do to make me question my perspective and/or sanity. To me the Timbers look like a eleven guitar players simultaneously playing eleven different solos. Calmer people answer back with numbers – e.g. the Armchair Analyst reminding me of Darlington Nagbe's impressive chance creation statistics, followed by the Soccer Made in Oregon noting that Nagbe created as many chances in the second half against New York City FC as a lot of players do in an entire game.
But, damn me if I can't stop evil, doubting questions from popping into my head: what, exactly, does "chances created" mean? What's a "chance"? Portland v. NYCFC didn't feature a ton of clear openings.
Basically, the whole week has felt like everyone telling me the sky is orange, while all I see when I look up is blue. All that has me of a mind to take a different approach to the preview this week, say, weighing Portland's constituent parts against Seattle's constituent parts and seeing how they stack up. Here goes:
And, to all those other rivalries out there, you're doing it wrong. (Kidding (inspired by #3). I enjoy everything about Seattle v. Portland, but I couldn't give less of a shit about that stuff.)
With that out of the way, it’s preview time.
Seattle Sounders FC v. Portland Timbers
For starters, the gap between how I see the Portland Timbers and how other (maybe) smart(er), and definitely better-connected observers see them has the noodles that make up my brain unraveling a little. The team I watched fumbled all over that tiny Yankee Stadium pitch with all the grace and confidence of a teenage boy (or me) trying to undo a bra (look, it's not my long suit). Portland eventually got to what NYCFC couldn't – e.g. bumbling the ball over the line – so they won. Even the one thing the Timbers did well didn't look so graceful. Yeah, yeah, Adam Kwarasey won Save of the Week (start watching about 1:10 in there). I mean, that's a no-look save in the end (the vote is rigged; stupid democracy). The man flinched. (Not judging; I would have flinched and squealed.)
While not everyone saw the game - and see the Timbers' season as a whole - differently, enough people do to make me question my perspective and/or sanity. To me the Timbers look like a eleven guitar players simultaneously playing eleven different solos. Calmer people answer back with numbers – e.g. the Armchair Analyst reminding me of Darlington Nagbe's impressive chance creation statistics, followed by the Soccer Made in Oregon noting that Nagbe created as many chances in the second half against New York City FC as a lot of players do in an entire game.
But, damn me if I can't stop evil, doubting questions from popping into my head: what, exactly, does "chances created" mean? What's a "chance"? Portland v. NYCFC didn't feature a ton of clear openings.
Basically, the whole week has felt like everyone telling me the sky is orange, while all I see when I look up is blue. All that has me of a mind to take a different approach to the preview this week, say, weighing Portland's constituent parts against Seattle's constituent parts and seeing how they stack up. Here goes:
