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[Standing Disclaimer: While I have watched…just a stupid amount of MLS over the years, I don’t watch the vast majority of games, never mind all of them. As such, it’s fair to take anything below that isn’t a hard number or a physical trophy as an impression, a couple steps removed.]
Thumbnail History
Born as the New York/New Jersey Metro Stars (and with a logo inspired by, yet embarrassing for, the bottom of a skateboard), Red Bull New York, aka, New Jersey’s finest soccer team, has always been a weird one – e.g., the one time they reached MLS Cup (2008), they made it by way of a run through MLS’s Western Conference. Despite later, praiseworthy successes (wait for it), the Red Bulls have been…haunted, I suppose(?), by a failure to take that final step – hence, the once-famous saying, “that’s so Metro.” Did that start over the earliest seasons when they missed the playoffs almost as often as they made them (they even felt the cruel caress of a Wooden Spoon in 1999), or when they seized their second Wooden Spoon in 2009 (yep! the season after their only MLS Cup)? I don’t know, honestly. What I do know is that the rebrand from MetroStars to Red Bull came in 2006, immediately before that sharp rise to and fall from glory. And yet, that second Wooden Spoon season aside, the Red Bulls became the team that MLS fans know today – i.e., the one that qualifies for the playoffs every single season (which, per one in-house source, is a sportz record). They’ve crossed that threshold with a heavy limp, at times, and more lately than before (i.e., four of the past five seasons). In some ways, that has become the Red Bulls new normal…
Best Season(s)
It’s gotta be one of the three seasons that Red Bull won the Supporters’ Shield, so that’s 2013, 2015 and 2018. All that started with the arrival of France/Arsenal legend Thierry Henry, but he was only around for the 2013 Shield and probably mattered most in terms of creating a culture of success and/or embracing the full potential of having one of the world’s most famous cities (NYC) as a recruitment draw. Only two big-name players were present for all three Shields, both of whom belong on the MLS all-time lists for me: Luis Robles, one of the more underrated goalkeepers in MLS history, and Bradley Wright-Phillips, one of the best pure, poaching goal-scorers the league has ever seen. Midfield machine Dax McCarty deserves honorable mention for being present for two of their Shields, but how much this succession of Red Bull teams rotated and still found good parts to replace the departing ones – e.g., Tim Cahill, Jamison Olave and Tim Cahill in 2013, Damien Perinelle, Sacha Kljestan and (why not?) Mike Grella in 2015, and Aaron Long, Sean Davis and Daniel Royer in 2018 - is more or less the story.
Long-Term Tendencies
To state the obvious, they’ve played “energy-drink soccer” since the energy-drink company bought them in 2006 – i.e., a high-pressing approach that demands they chase every ball, shut down nearly every player north of the goalkeeper for large stretches of every game they play, and generally ugly things up. It takes attacking talent to redeem all that darkness, something they had during those Shield seasons and something they have very much lacked since. For all its aesthetic crimes, all that calculated frustration has a long track record of keeping the opposition off the board: they have been either average or below for goals allowed in every single season since that second Wooden Spoon season.
Identity
Per all the above, an overly-aggressive ugly ducking that periodically becomes a radiant, goal-scoring swan. Seriously, they scored well over the league average over five straight seasons (2011-2016) and, but for a slip on the defensive side in 2014, when they slipped over the league average (I stand corrected by myself), they may have won a third.
Joy Points: 27 (see end of post for methodology*)
10 Names to Know
Clint Mathis (2000-2003)
He didn’t stay long, and I think he got injured here and there, but Mathis has a strong goddamn argument as MLS-New Jersey’s first truly exciting player. He possessed a surplus of audacity every time he chose to conjure it – and he scored plenty of goals for the Red Bulls in his short time, plus (I think) an insurance goal against Mexico and a crucial tying goal in South Korea against the hosts – which made him an amazing player when he was "on," but he still strikes me as an artist waiting on inspiration.
Amado Guevara (2003-2006)
A Honduran, another player who didn’t last long, but I’d call Guevara the Metros first effective playmaker…and, sure enough, his time on the time coincides with their first seasons over the average on goals scored. He was a solid No. 10, able to either combine in close quarters or change the play entirely with a long, booming pass, plus he could belt from range.
Juan Pablo Angel (2007-2010)
One of Red Bulls’ first designated players (if not the first…but I don’t think he is), and worth at least 90 percent of the pennies (i.e., close to all of 'em). Angel was a solid target forward who scored slightly more often than every other game for them, who also had the chops to drop deep and help the attack up the field. Lethal and useful, he played a big role in lifting this team to its first actually good season.
Rafa Marquez (2010-2012)
I have Marquez standing in for Lothar Mattheus as the “bug-zapper” kind of signing the Red Bulls used to do – i.e., a headlining with waning talent and no nearly enough interest in being in New York to put up with MLS writ large (e.g., venues and referees). I also went for Marquez for showing that the organization made better choices when this sickness took hold.
Luis Robles (2012-2019)
Already flagged above, Robles was as top-tier on goalkeeping fundamentals like shot-stopping as he was on value-added stuff like distribution. He never really cracked the U.S. Men’s team – fwiw, I don’t think it would have changed anything if he had, for both good or ill – but he could have. Robles was that good.
Thumbnail History
Born as the New York/New Jersey Metro Stars (and with a logo inspired by, yet embarrassing for, the bottom of a skateboard), Red Bull New York, aka, New Jersey’s finest soccer team, has always been a weird one – e.g., the one time they reached MLS Cup (2008), they made it by way of a run through MLS’s Western Conference. Despite later, praiseworthy successes (wait for it), the Red Bulls have been…haunted, I suppose(?), by a failure to take that final step – hence, the once-famous saying, “that’s so Metro.” Did that start over the earliest seasons when they missed the playoffs almost as often as they made them (they even felt the cruel caress of a Wooden Spoon in 1999), or when they seized their second Wooden Spoon in 2009 (yep! the season after their only MLS Cup)? I don’t know, honestly. What I do know is that the rebrand from MetroStars to Red Bull came in 2006, immediately before that sharp rise to and fall from glory. And yet, that second Wooden Spoon season aside, the Red Bulls became the team that MLS fans know today – i.e., the one that qualifies for the playoffs every single season (which, per one in-house source, is a sportz record). They’ve crossed that threshold with a heavy limp, at times, and more lately than before (i.e., four of the past five seasons). In some ways, that has become the Red Bulls new normal…
Best Season(s)
It’s gotta be one of the three seasons that Red Bull won the Supporters’ Shield, so that’s 2013, 2015 and 2018. All that started with the arrival of France/Arsenal legend Thierry Henry, but he was only around for the 2013 Shield and probably mattered most in terms of creating a culture of success and/or embracing the full potential of having one of the world’s most famous cities (NYC) as a recruitment draw. Only two big-name players were present for all three Shields, both of whom belong on the MLS all-time lists for me: Luis Robles, one of the more underrated goalkeepers in MLS history, and Bradley Wright-Phillips, one of the best pure, poaching goal-scorers the league has ever seen. Midfield machine Dax McCarty deserves honorable mention for being present for two of their Shields, but how much this succession of Red Bull teams rotated and still found good parts to replace the departing ones – e.g., Tim Cahill, Jamison Olave and Tim Cahill in 2013, Damien Perinelle, Sacha Kljestan and (why not?) Mike Grella in 2015, and Aaron Long, Sean Davis and Daniel Royer in 2018 - is more or less the story.
Long-Term Tendencies
To state the obvious, they’ve played “energy-drink soccer” since the energy-drink company bought them in 2006 – i.e., a high-pressing approach that demands they chase every ball, shut down nearly every player north of the goalkeeper for large stretches of every game they play, and generally ugly things up. It takes attacking talent to redeem all that darkness, something they had during those Shield seasons and something they have very much lacked since. For all its aesthetic crimes, all that calculated frustration has a long track record of keeping the opposition off the board: they have been either average or below for goals allowed in every single season since that second Wooden Spoon season.
Identity
Per all the above, an overly-aggressive ugly ducking that periodically becomes a radiant, goal-scoring swan. Seriously, they scored well over the league average over five straight seasons (2011-2016) and, but for a slip on the defensive side in 2014, when they slipped over the league average (I stand corrected by myself), they may have won a third.
Joy Points: 27 (see end of post for methodology*)
10 Names to Know
Clint Mathis (2000-2003)
He didn’t stay long, and I think he got injured here and there, but Mathis has a strong goddamn argument as MLS-New Jersey’s first truly exciting player. He possessed a surplus of audacity every time he chose to conjure it – and he scored plenty of goals for the Red Bulls in his short time, plus (I think) an insurance goal against Mexico and a crucial tying goal in South Korea against the hosts – which made him an amazing player when he was "on," but he still strikes me as an artist waiting on inspiration.
Amado Guevara (2003-2006)
A Honduran, another player who didn’t last long, but I’d call Guevara the Metros first effective playmaker…and, sure enough, his time on the time coincides with their first seasons over the average on goals scored. He was a solid No. 10, able to either combine in close quarters or change the play entirely with a long, booming pass, plus he could belt from range.
Juan Pablo Angel (2007-2010)
One of Red Bulls’ first designated players (if not the first…but I don’t think he is), and worth at least 90 percent of the pennies (i.e., close to all of 'em). Angel was a solid target forward who scored slightly more often than every other game for them, who also had the chops to drop deep and help the attack up the field. Lethal and useful, he played a big role in lifting this team to its first actually good season.
Rafa Marquez (2010-2012)
I have Marquez standing in for Lothar Mattheus as the “bug-zapper” kind of signing the Red Bulls used to do – i.e., a headlining with waning talent and no nearly enough interest in being in New York to put up with MLS writ large (e.g., venues and referees). I also went for Marquez for showing that the organization made better choices when this sickness took hold.
Luis Robles (2012-2019)
Already flagged above, Robles was as top-tier on goalkeeping fundamentals like shot-stopping as he was on value-added stuff like distribution. He never really cracked the U.S. Men’s team – fwiw, I don’t think it would have changed anything if he had, for both good or ill – but he could have. Robles was that good.
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Thierry Henry (2010-2014)
The rare player in MLS history who picked defenses like a skeleton key. That’s less to argue he could score at will than to say Henry could find a lane to goal from just about any spot in the attacking third and whether he scored the goal or assisted on it. Nearly ten seasons later, I still call Henry one of the best signings in MLS history.
Dax McCarty (2011-2016)
A little engine that could and an actually gifted central midfield passer (if without the finesse of a No. 10), McCarty belongs in whatever Hall of Fame they’ve built (or will build) for midfielders. Even over-running his lease with Nashville, he can still cut off an attack and kick-start one in the other direction in the same second – something he excelled at in his Red Bull days.
Bradley Wright-Phillips (2013-2019)
Something about the leprechaun dance captured his essence, as if he operated two steps ahead in the way that Lucky (from the Lucky Charms box) utterly failed to. BWP scored plenty from range, but getting on the end of things was his absolute gift and the metier of his art form.
Aaron Long (2017-2022)
Long’s a damned good, all-‘round defender, but also because he came up through the Red Bull system – which, apparently, is not their academy – and that seems fitting. He’s with LAFC now, and still a regular with the U.S. Men’s National Team, something I see as a testament to the Red Bulls of not just encouraging young players, but actually trusting them.
Sean Davis (2015-2021)
A better example than Long (probably), Davis represents the best, last example of the kind of “spine” player that has allowed the Red Bulls to stay perennially competitive…if only in some form. Rangy, smart, a solid passer, a decently dangerous attacking threat (if more by assists than goals), he also feels a little like where they ended up. Which is probably short of where they want to be…
Where They Finished in 2023 & What the Past Says About That, If Anything
A laggard 17th place and with a negative goal-differential (-3). That had everything to do with how badly they struggled on the attacking side (in a word, mightily): just 36 goals scored for the entire season, aka, perilously close to a 1.0 goals-for average, aka, not even close to competitive enough to compete. Still, they picked up every one of the last three wins they needed to in order to reach the playoffs and picked up one more besides when they beat Charlotte FC on the play-in (wasn’t close, btw). So that’s the playoff streak still kicking, plus one better…
Notes/Impressions on the Current Roster/State of Ambition
Looks like the work-in-progress/failed Plan A it became by the end of 2023 – i.e., if they want to so much as look at silverware, they need Lewis Morgan to come back whole and ready for Dante Vanzeir to become the player they think they signed. They’re not talent-free by any means – e.g., they have a respectable central defense between Andres Reyes and Sean (Sean, right?) Nealis, a league-elite right back in John Tolkin, and, at forward, Corey Burke has great speed and size and Elias Manoel has his moments. I genuinely like Luquinhas (to the point of coveting, if I’m being honest) and Frank Amaya and the young Daniel Edelman give them the ol’ familiar combative spine, even if it isn’t league-elite.
If the Red Bulls lack anything, it’s the same thing I’ve gone back to time and again above: genuine, consistent attacking threats, and wherever they can deploy them on the field. It’s less that the formula is wrong than the ingredients are off – and whether they have an acquisition system/process that can find them the right parts or cares enough to try.
* Joy Point Index
Winning the CONCACAF Champions’ League: 5 points
Claiming Supporters’ Shield : 4 points
Winning MLS Cup: 3 points
MLS Cup Runner-Up: 2 points
Winning the U.S. Open Cup: 2 points
Winning CONCACAF Champions Cup: 2 points
MLS Is Back Cup: 2 points (yeah, yeah, I’m a Timbers fan; still, that was a tough one)
CONCACAF Champions League Semifinalist: 1 point
Making the Playoffs: 1 point
Missing the Playoffs: -1 point
Missing Playoffs in 1996-97, 2002-2004 (when 80% of the league qualified): - 2 points
Wooden Spoon: -3 point
The rare player in MLS history who picked defenses like a skeleton key. That’s less to argue he could score at will than to say Henry could find a lane to goal from just about any spot in the attacking third and whether he scored the goal or assisted on it. Nearly ten seasons later, I still call Henry one of the best signings in MLS history.
Dax McCarty (2011-2016)
A little engine that could and an actually gifted central midfield passer (if without the finesse of a No. 10), McCarty belongs in whatever Hall of Fame they’ve built (or will build) for midfielders. Even over-running his lease with Nashville, he can still cut off an attack and kick-start one in the other direction in the same second – something he excelled at in his Red Bull days.
Bradley Wright-Phillips (2013-2019)
Something about the leprechaun dance captured his essence, as if he operated two steps ahead in the way that Lucky (from the Lucky Charms box) utterly failed to. BWP scored plenty from range, but getting on the end of things was his absolute gift and the metier of his art form.
Aaron Long (2017-2022)
Long’s a damned good, all-‘round defender, but also because he came up through the Red Bull system – which, apparently, is not their academy – and that seems fitting. He’s with LAFC now, and still a regular with the U.S. Men’s National Team, something I see as a testament to the Red Bulls of not just encouraging young players, but actually trusting them.
Sean Davis (2015-2021)
A better example than Long (probably), Davis represents the best, last example of the kind of “spine” player that has allowed the Red Bulls to stay perennially competitive…if only in some form. Rangy, smart, a solid passer, a decently dangerous attacking threat (if more by assists than goals), he also feels a little like where they ended up. Which is probably short of where they want to be…
Where They Finished in 2023 & What the Past Says About That, If Anything
A laggard 17th place and with a negative goal-differential (-3). That had everything to do with how badly they struggled on the attacking side (in a word, mightily): just 36 goals scored for the entire season, aka, perilously close to a 1.0 goals-for average, aka, not even close to competitive enough to compete. Still, they picked up every one of the last three wins they needed to in order to reach the playoffs and picked up one more besides when they beat Charlotte FC on the play-in (wasn’t close, btw). So that’s the playoff streak still kicking, plus one better…
Notes/Impressions on the Current Roster/State of Ambition
Looks like the work-in-progress/failed Plan A it became by the end of 2023 – i.e., if they want to so much as look at silverware, they need Lewis Morgan to come back whole and ready for Dante Vanzeir to become the player they think they signed. They’re not talent-free by any means – e.g., they have a respectable central defense between Andres Reyes and Sean (Sean, right?) Nealis, a league-elite right back in John Tolkin, and, at forward, Corey Burke has great speed and size and Elias Manoel has his moments. I genuinely like Luquinhas (to the point of coveting, if I’m being honest) and Frank Amaya and the young Daniel Edelman give them the ol’ familiar combative spine, even if it isn’t league-elite.
If the Red Bulls lack anything, it’s the same thing I’ve gone back to time and again above: genuine, consistent attacking threats, and wherever they can deploy them on the field. It’s less that the formula is wrong than the ingredients are off – and whether they have an acquisition system/process that can find them the right parts or cares enough to try.
* Joy Point Index
Winning the CONCACAF Champions’ League: 5 points
Claiming Supporters’ Shield : 4 points
Winning MLS Cup: 3 points
MLS Cup Runner-Up: 2 points
Winning the U.S. Open Cup: 2 points
Winning CONCACAF Champions Cup: 2 points
MLS Is Back Cup: 2 points (yeah, yeah, I’m a Timbers fan; still, that was a tough one)
CONCACAF Champions League Semifinalist: 1 point
Making the Playoffs: 1 point
Missing the Playoffs: -1 point
Missing Playoffs in 1996-97, 2002-2004 (when 80% of the league qualified): - 2 points
Wooden Spoon: -3 point
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