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| Leagues Cup, in human form. |
That approximates my annual experience with Leagues Cup: a bunch of strangers dropping in to the familiar, interpretable world of the MLS regular season, thereby detouring into some wacky side quest. And it only means something to the team/couple that walks away with the trophy, whether in metal or human form.
Portland Timbers 1-0 Queretaro FC
About the Game
When halftime rolled around and the broadcast got to showing the first half highlights, they started with a wildly overcooked cross that capped one of the rare competent attacking sequences managed by either team. They had a goal to show, of course – a bumbler scored by Cristhian Paredes through a thicket of flailing legs and falling bodies (and that link may or may not take you to it) – but the final stats speak to how little happened before and after. Jonathan Perlaza got sent off for a foul and a fit just before the halftime whistle and that left nothing but the struggle to stay awake through the second half.
Near as I can tell, Queretaro came to defend and without any form of an actionable Plan B. The 0.3 xG awarded to them in the official line matches the eye test…wish I could say the same about the 1.6 they handed Portland, because that would have hit like Red Bull and Everclear compared to what I watched.
That’s all I have on the game and I’ve already exhausted my knowledge of Queretaro. Now, to entertain some, but not all of the thoughts I had as I watched. [Ed. – The Plan is to pare the thoughts down to five for all future posts – and the length of the posts along with ‘em.]
