Level Set 1, DC United: History & 2025, More of the Same, Only More So

DC United, first decade or so.

What follows is a brief history of DC United, plus more brief notes on whatever long-term tendencies they have. Their 2025 season gets weighed on both sides of that and the whole thing ends with where I see things with them in this very specific moment in time - i.e., before First Kick 2026. You should count on things happening between here and there.

The post ends with a scale I came up with to measure the long-term success of every team in Major League Soccer. It does some things well (e.g., count trophies/achievements), other things less well (capture recent trends). It's called the Joint Points Scale and you can find a link below that explains what it does. With that... 

DC United: A Thumbnail History
Pretty much anyone who follows Major League Soccer knows that DC United was its first great dynasty. How that success came about may be less known. Bruce Arena built his reputation there, of course, but it also started with winning the lottery on one of their first Marquee Player picks (Marco Etcheverry; click here and scroll down to see the full list). His selection connected them to the Tahuichi Academy, Bolivia’s (then?) premier player development academy, which connected them to Jaime Moreno and those two signings, plus a semi-random striker who would hold the single-season record for goals scored for 23 years (Roy Lassiter) went a long way in the league’s early days. Thanks to defenses staffed mostly of recent amateurs and college grads, MLS was a free-scoring league over its first five seasons, and DC generally led the way (with the 1998 LA Galaxy as the other big swinger). After the 2001 contraction, scoring fell off cliff (from 51 goals scored/allowed in 2000 to 42.1 in 2002) and, with the DP Rule/the ability to buy talent seven to eight (or 12) years in the future, DC’s on-field successes gave them the reputation as the best team in MLS, which helped them bring in ambitious players, which one could argue (as I am) made their generally forgotten mid-2000s Renaissance possible. With Moreno back from a stint in the EPL, shiny new playmaker, Christian Gomez, pulling the strings from midfield, Ben Olsen and Brian Carroll doing the dirty work and OG Kiwi Ryan Nelsen anchoring the backline, DC won a fifth MLS Cup in 2004; with solid replacements shuffled into the lineup – e.g., Bobby Boswell at the back and Luciano Emilio spearheading the attack – they added back-to-back Supporters’ Shields in 2006 and 2007. If you’re just counting trophies, all of that early success created the firewall thick enough to keep DC among the all-time most successful teams in MLS history (for now). They’ve flirted with success here and there, particularly over the competent, yet trophy-free seasons of 2012-2019, but DC has been flaming fucking awful more often than most since their glory years, as demonstrated by (now) five (5!) Wooden Spoons and some of the worst seasons in MLS history (looking at you, 2013). It’s not so much that they haven’t tried – e.g., a young Luciano Acosta, Wayne Rooney and Christian Benteke delivered! – but all that talent labored under lineups, systems, rosters, coaches, etc., that made every good player work twice as hard. Part of that followed from a hit-rate on signing top-rate talent from outside MLS that failed to hit – e.g., Edison Flores, Gabriel Pirani – but few teams have fallen for the next “wunderkind” with more ardor and frequency than most. They signed Freddy Adu 20 steps out of the womb and pissed away too many seasons waiting for him to become the player his agent promised; one hears echoes of that in the seasons wasted waiting for Santino Quaranta and Nick DeLeon to fill their forever-potential. They’ve been equally unsuccessful when it comes to rescuing once-useful-to-great cast-offs from other MLS teams – e.g., Julius James, Fabian Espindola, Chris Rolfe, Alvaro Saborio, and Pedro Santos – all of which has combined to cause then to fall ever further off not just their once-lofty standard, but the league as a whole.

DC United Scouting Report: This One's About Aspirations

Is the future so bright that I need shades?

What started as a mediocre season for DC United has spun out of control in recent weeks – to the tune of making them the worst defensive team in Major League Soccer. The question a gently-hobbled version of FC Cincinnati answers on Saturday is whether they run with the Club du Foot Montreals of the league, or with the Orlando City SCs, or the…jesus, San Jose Earthquakes. To start with the basics…

DC United
1-3-3, 6 pts., 9 gf, 17 ga (-8); home 1-1-2, away 0-2-1
Last 5 Results: DWDLL
Locale/Strength of Schedule
v SKC (2-1 W); v MTL (0-0 D); @ ORL (1-4 L); v CLB (1-2 L); @ SJ (1-6 L)

Notes from the Field
Because I didn’t think the debacle at San Jose would yield much useful data – just from the seven-plus minutes of the highlights, DC gifted San Jose the first two goals, got in one another’s way all over the field, and broke the basic rules of holding a good defensive line on goals four and five – I spent most of my time (about 45 minutes) watching their home loss to Columbus Crew SC. Based on that review, head coach Troy Lesesne still has DC defending high and playing to force turnovers all over the field (i.e., they hunt the ball), Christian Benteke remains their key player/salvation (he’s scored over half their goals so far), and, besides that, it’s mostly a lot of semi-headless running around. They kept the game versus Columbus tighter (bravo), but they still did plenty of getting in one another’s way and players that compel one to say, “look out for this guy,” of “one of the league’s best” are in short supply. Despite all of the above, DC posts respectable top-line numbers – e.g., they’ve reliably posted shots in the double digits and get around a half dozen on goal every game (the Columbus game was the exception) – and the defensive numbers rarely looked egregious…though the 4.0 goals allowed/game over the past three games would appear to suggest some issues…

Notes on Formation & Personnel
Despite the above, Lesesne has stuck with the same line up/personnel combo over the past four games, with only a couple adjustments barely worth noting (prime example, for reference). The back four in his inevitable 4-2-3-1 has included David Schnegg at left back, Lucas Bartlett and Kye Rowles for center backs and Aaron “I Hope He Likes Living in DC” Herrera as the preferred right back; a youngster named Derek Dodson has acted as understudy and started in the San Jose disaster. Matti Peltola has paired with Hosei Kijima at the two in every line up I reviewed, while the preferred three appears to be Joao Peglow (their assist leader, fwiw, at two), Gabriel Pirani, and the high-effort, ever-combative Jared Stroud (Dominique Badji, who is too old for this shit, started over him at San Jose). Benteke tops off the formation at the one, aka, the loneliest number (number). Again, Columbus played one step ahead of DC on both sides of the ball and, gods willing, Cincinnati will do the same, but both the game at Orlando and the game at San Jose present as implosions – i.e., decent performances utterly undone by repeated, catastrophic mistakes.

Getting Reacquainted with DC United, MLS's Aging Rockstars

Give us a push back stage, love, and you can see it.

Thumbnail History
Pretty much anyone who follows Major League Soccer knows that DC United was its first great dynasty. How that success came about may be less known. Bruce Arena built his reputation there, of course, but it also started with winning the lottery on one of their first Marquee Player picks (Marco Etcheverry; scroll down here to see the full list). His selection connected them to the Tahuichi Academy, Bolivia’s (then?) premier player development academy, which connected them to Jaime Moreno and those two signings, plus a semi-random striker who would hold the single-season recordfor goals scored for 23 years (Roy Lassiter) went a long way in the league’s early days. Thanks to defenses staffed mostly of recent amateurs and college grads, MLS was a free-scoring league over its first five seasons, and DC generally led the way (with the 1998 LA Galaxy as the other big swinger). After the 2001 contraction, scoring fell off cliff (from 51 goals scored/allowed in 2000 to 42.1 in 2002) and, with the DP Rule/the ability to buy talent seven to eight (or 12) years in the future, DC’s on-field successes gave them the reputation as the best team in MLS, which helped them bring in ambitious players, which one could argue (as I am) made their generally forgotten mid-2000s Renaissance possible. With Moreno back from a stint in the EPL, shiny new playmaker, Christian Gomez, pulling the strings from midfield, Ben Olsen and Brian Carroll doing the dirty work and OG Kiwi Ryan Nelsen anchoring the backline, DC won a fifth MLS Cup in 2004; with solid replacements shuffled into the lineup – e.g., Bobby Boswell at the back and Luciano Emilio spearheading the attack – they added back-to-back Supporters’ Shields in 2006 and 2007. If you’re just counting trophies, all of that early success created the firewall thick enough to keep DC among the all-time most successful teams in MLS history (i.e., sixth on the all-time Joy Points Scale (methodology below*)). They’ve flirted with success here and there, particularly over the competent, yet trophy-free seasons of 2012-2019 aside, but DC has been flaming fucking awful more often than most since their glory years, as demonstrated by (now) five (5!) Wooden Spoons and some of the worst seasons in MLS history (looking at you, 2013). It’s not so much that they haven’t tried – e.g., a young Luciano Acosta, Wayne Rooney and Christian Benteke delivered! – but all that talent labored under lineups, systems, rosters, coaches, etc., that made every good player work twice as hard. Part of that followed from a hit-rate on signing top-rate talent from outside MLS that failed to hit – e.g., Edison Flores, Gabriel Pirani – but few teams have fallen for the next “wunderkind” with more ardor and frequency than most. They signed Freddy Adu 20 steps out of the womb and pissed away too many seasons waiting for him to become the player his agent promised; one hears echoes of that in the seasons wasted waiting for Santino Quaranta and Nick DeLeon to fill their forever-potential. They’ve been equally unsuccessful when it comes to rescuing once-useful-to-great cast-offs from other MLS teams – e.g., Julius James, Fabian Espindola, Chris Rolfe, Alvaro Saborio, and Pedro Santos – all of which has combined to cause then to fall ever further off not just their once-lofty standard, but the league as a whole.

DC United Scouting Report: 75% Coping with Fast Zombies

Only time will tell...

DC United kicked off its 2024 regular season with a 3-1 home win over the New England Revolution that knocked Armchair Analyst, Matt Doyle, off the fence. He’s now convinced that DC will make the 2024 playoffs, spin of the wheel with odds equal to betting it'll rain during November in Portland. He may be right, he may be crazy, he just may be the lunatic we’re looking for…but all I can think when I look at the East so far is “competitive.”

That’s a thought for another day, because the only thing I care about right now is whether the Portland Timbers can compete against DC on Saturday at…is it still Providence Park, or did the state of Oregon’s real estate king/hospital system fuck off a la Da Bella? Anyhoo, as much as the weight of the schedule ahead feels lighter than it did when it first dropped – see road games against the punchless (e.g., New York City FC) and the wounded (Houston Dynamo FC) teams – I’d still rate the hike till May as moderate to difficult at a minimum. The Timbers can knock down that hike to easy-to-moderate, but they’ll have to play well to do it.

Based on the few indicators at hand, DC will shove that question to the fore, one way or the other. They may or may not be good –I’ll get to that – but they play the game like smartly-trained methed-up puppies. They showed they have the youth and legs last week to run a highly active and coordinated press; no Revolution player could hold the ball for over a second without a DC player either jumping in his pocket or chasing him like a ravening fast zombie. With a new coach (Troy Lesesne), early-season enthusiasm, and the team’s storied (long ago) history lashing at their shoulders, I expect DC to run at every Timbers player within 20 yards of the ball from the starting whistle until they take a spell to catch the breath. The method to the madness showed up in Doyle’s Big Week 1 Wrap:

“Lesesne talked all week about winning the ball higher up the pitch to give [Christian] Benteke opportunities and it worked.”

- Calen Carr