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| At least one metaphor for what MLS needs right now. |
A couple items tonight, one actual contemporary commentary,
the other clean up from yesterday. In order of urgency…which depends on how one
defines urgency, I guess.
The Expansion Draft, and the Portland Timbers, and the
Expansion Draft
As has already been discussed on twitter today, and at some
length and in some depth, all of Major League Soccer clubs made their (not
really) Sophie’s Choice as to which players on their rosters to protect, and
which to offer up to…the Germans? (Pretty sure it’s the Germans in Sophie's Choice, but not sure on
the iteration of Germans – e.g. the thwarted imperialists, or the actual
dickheads (e.g. Nazis)).
At any rate, Portland cast the following to the Huns (jingo!):
Dairon “On Loan” Asprilla, Jack “Not Nick” Barmby, Nat “Retired?” Borchers,
Kennedy “JK!” Igboananike, Chris “Who?” Klute, Jack “What The Hell?” McInerney,
Jermaine “Conifers & Citrus Player of the Year” Taylor, Steven “Please Go”
Taylor, Zarek…wow, there are, like, a lot of dudes listed here. OK, the rest
are Zarek “Don’t Care” Valentin, Ben “Still here?” Zemanski, Nick “Forgotte…look,
never mind. I’m getting closer to “full asshole” with each nickname, so I’ll shut
that off before feelings get hurt (and folks start making assumptions). The point is, the Timbers didn’t expose a
lot in the way of “key” personnel. Also, that’s not necessarily a comment on
the quality of the players exposed. Some of those shitty nicknames notwithstanding, on the
other hand...
In all honesty, last season was bad enough that I’d like to
think even the “safe players” (bar, seriously, three) experienced a little
heart flutter when the list went out. Gentlemen…
As for the Expansion Draft as a whole, I guess the only
thing left to ask is which players I would take if I were either Atlanta or
Minneapolis FC United (gotta say, the unoriginality/overlap in those team names has its upside). And, here’s
that, followed by a brief explanation for each choice.
