NYCFC Pummels Colorado: A Time to Adjust Expectations?

Counts just the same...just not a good look...

[Each week I (try to) watch three full, 90-minute games. And I write ‘em up. Part 1 of 3, for Major League Soccer’s Week 21.]

Why This Game? I wanted New York City FC’s attack measured against the Colorado Rapids’ league-best defense because, per reports and rumors, NYCFC has a bad enough defense that they need the offense to matter. And, going the other way, could the Rapids rack up the goals against NYCFC’s allegedly “shaky D”?

On the Result
Did not see that coming. I knew NYCFC’s offense had the mirror-image rep to contrast with their defense, but to drag the Rapids’ defensive record back into the pack with a 5-1 win? The first two goals deserve more focus, and not just because they came before Michael Azira got absolutely, totally justifiably sent off (we’re talking a text-book-stupid second yellow), but because their manner. NYCFC pushed players into the attack in a way that meant getting the ball past the first guy only meant you had to deal with the second guy, like, right away. Think World War I, only with success. They kept piling on after Azira came off and, before long, the bottom of the field dropped off on the Rapids’ side...sorta like watching Inversion. (Is that the title of that Leonardo DiCaprio joint, the one that choked on its own exposition? Crap, no, it's title Inception. Still didn't like it; goddamn gimmicks).  The thing that really struck me is that I’ve seen Colorado work an outlet ball pretty reliably in the past – when they don’t play out of the back (where they usually do all right), they’ll bomb long balls to Kevin Doyle, or maybe Marlon Hairston. They couldn’t find either player Saturday, and they struggled mightily as a result. Also, I think I saw a lot of New York’s attack go through gap between Mikeil Williams and Jared Jeffrey…often enough to wonder what the hell happened to Bobby Burling (he was on the bench, so OK, answered that one….partially). I think the real point of curiosity came with what happens if Colorado falls behind – by more than two goals, especially.

Trapp and Tchani, and What’s Wrong in Columbus

So long as you don't care if it goes in the hole, you're good!

This should go without saying, but because I don’t recall saying this anywhere else, I may as well get it out there now: the Portland Timbers are the only team in Major League Soccer on which I feel meaningfully qualified to comment. Even then, I should confess to civilian status – e.g., I’ve never coached anyone and my outdoor playing experience arguably topped out when I played on a Jewish rec-league in Washington D.C.

Got it? Good. Now, let me explain why Tony Tchani and Wil Trapp should never share the same midfield.

As recently as late last season, I posted previews for Columbus Crew SC that flagged the Tchani/Trapp combo as a one of their strengths. They both have something to recommend them: Trapp hits one hell of an accurate long ball from deep positions and he was good enough at close distribution, too; Tchani, meanwhile, provides an imposing presence in midfield and he strokes a perfectly-weighted pass into the attacking channels better than 75-80% of MLS midfielders. It’s not surprising, then, the Crew SC wants both players on the field.

And that’s where it breaks down for me. Are Trapp’s and Tchani’s skill-sets complementary?

Scratch a Win, Expose the Rot: The Maddening Relativity of Form

Wow. Financial people really are incredible tools.

Because I don't read about soccer much (way too much bum-fluff out there), I've been spending some time just staring at the standings and the Results Map (hereinafter, "The Map") to see if I can’t yank some meaningful trends out of 'em (or maybe just make some up?). The one that came to me over the weekend builds on an argument I made (and disguised well beneath excess verbiage) in my write-up on the Portland Timbers' win over Seattle. The further examples/research/thinking have allowed me to compact this argument into something succinct:

Not all wins are created equal.

Succinct and, as it happens, really obvious. Still, the point is, when any given team is bad enough – say, the Seattle Sounders in recent weeks and/or most of the season – a win against them doesn't say much more about the team that beats them than that they aren't as bad as said terrible team, in this case Seattle. The naked statement above is generic to the point of banality. It only gets interesting when you start applying it to specific Major League Soccer teams.

As noted before, I view The Map as a modern goddamn miracle, and that's my source material for this little exercise (and so many other things). If you run your cursor over a string of results for any given team, it'll light up the final score as well as who that team played and where. In that process, you’ll get a better measure of that team.

Ignacio Piatti: MLS's Most Dangerous?

Have we tried, "cupcakes suck"? I like that look...

Major League Soccer's Week 20 featured a lot of big performances from the league's biggest names – e.g., a hat-trick for the Montreal Impact's Didier Drogba and another hat-trick for Toronto FC's Sebastian Giovinco (the latter, especially, spelled relief like making it to the toilet in time). Elsewhere, the New York Red Bulls' Sacha Kljestan tormented New York City FC until Frank Lampard could stand it no more!

I've already hinted at this in the write-up on Montreal's big win over the Philadelphia Union, but I wanted to state it plainly here: Ignacio Piatti is the most dangerous player in MLS right now. That's a subtly different question than the MVP – where candidates reasonably abound (e.g. Giovinco, Kljestan, the Portland Timbers' Diego Valeri, or, as argued here, even Sam Cronin fits, so long as you're talking about the most important player on a good team) – and Piatti's definitely part of that conversation as well; it's just that it's a different conversation. To get at the "most dangerous" label, I'll contrast him with Valeri, another clear and justified talent.

First, I love Valeri. For me, he's the best Timbers attacker, the guy who's not just good, but a guy who makes another very good player, Fanendo Adi, even better. He does damage in several ways, including, but not limited to, the audacious shot and the killer pass: he's a huge part of what makes Portland good, when they're good. (He also rocks this saintly vibe; very appealing. Wouldn't trade him for anyone in MLS. Honest. Where else can a man that earnest go?)

Clash of (What Passes for MLS’s Version of) Titans

Your vacation lives on! I thank you!

[The third and final game I watched this weekend pitted the then and current top two teams in MLS against one another, the Colorado Rapids v. FC Dallas.]

When it comes to parsing this year’s (semi-freakish) power match-up, it’s probably best/safest to break it down into discrete parts. There’s sort of a lot to unpack, and from multiple pieces of luggage. Even so, the balance of the chatter falls on the Rapids side of the ball – they’re the bigger transformation, after all – so I’ll end with them.

Oh, and the game ended 1-1. It really looked like the Rapids would hold on, but I guess that’s why Dallas is Dallas. Victor Ulloa cranking an equalizer from eastern freakin’ Colorado falls in line with things like Mauro Diaz’s passing and Fabian Castillo’s (or Michael Barrios’) dribbling.

Another reason why Dallas is Dallas? Chris Hedges and Walker Zimmerman. These are both good players, really good players. What sometimes gets lost with those two is just how young they are: 26 and 23, respectively. Barring a transfer (something I can see for Zimmerman before Hedges), that tandem has a long future together. In the here and now, though, having them back there buys your team time, maybe even an entire half, to scratch back into a game against a Colorado defense that gives up very, very little.

On the Sounders. Just for the Record.

This wasn't intended as an addendum to my tribute to the present Greatness of the New York rivalry, but it sort of played out as one. It also won't go on for long, because it's not a complicated thing to parse, no image needed, etc.

The Seattle Sounders are bad. I understand that I'm probably the 20th person to tell you the same thing this weekend, but, holy shit, they're like really, really bad. How bad? I have more on this later, when I talk about teams who are so bad that you almost have to throw out wins against them.

It gets weirder, actually, because when I saw the Sounders starting line-up going into what would become a 3-0 loss/suctioning of the spirit, it struck me as decent, maybe even decent enough to get a result. Having Dempsey under Morris seemed smart given their skill-sets, and putting Herculez Gomez opposite Andreas Ivanschitz made some kind of sense; Osvaldo Alonso didn't play (don't know why, don't care; not relevant), but Cristian Roldan and Erik Friberg felt competent, the defense, which has been good, was still there, and so on.

You can line up Argentina's starters and you'll never get a win if your team plays the way Seattle did on Sunday. Sporting Kansas City (oh yeah, that was the opponent, btw!) almost always outworks the opposition, but Seattle looked an awful, uncoordinated mess defensively: their players trailed their marks and the movement on the field generally, which translated to almost no pressure on the ball. Small wonder SKC could pick out players on their crosses. By the second half, everyone on the team was tuned out enough to reduce the game to skills drill for SKC – a shooting drill in particular.

It was either last week or the week before that Stumptown Footy's Chris Rifer tweeted the question of whether or not Seattle's coach Sigi Schmid would last through August. I replied that I thought he would, but, after that entirely dispirited shit-show, I'm not sure. When a team can't even muster the desire to defend its pride - and that translates to defending a beleaguered coach's job, that says something. Sigi could very well be done...

Best Damn Game of the Weekend (BDGotW): New Jersey Smacks Around New York

Fun! Just keep your hands where I can see 'em.

Major League Soccer's Week 20 featured a trio of routs (briefly, what Montreal did to Philly, and TFC’s, or rather Sebastian Giovinco's, destruction-by-free-kick of DC), but, for sheer entertainment value, for emotions heightened to high, permanent "eeeeee!", for just sheer fun, none of them topped the New York Derby. I didn't have the pleasure of watching the whole thing (on which, sad), but it turns out that New York City FC bloodying the New York Red Bulls earlier this month was just what this match-up needed!

The Red Bulls opened playing loose, just running head-long all over as if the goal of soccer was just getting tired. I know this feeling well thanks to all those times I responded to the own-goals I scored by trying VERY, VERY HARD TO MAKE IT BETTER. Their eagerness to repair the damage from that early July loss showed in every over-hit pass and the way players chased those not so much like they wanted the ball to play it, but to jump on it again and again and again, until it was flat. Until it knew their shame and embarrassment for letting even a sliver of blue into New York.

It looked desperate stuff and felt the same, basically, and one got the feeling that they wouldn't settle into the game until they scored – and that's when all the freneticism paid off. The Red Bulls picked off a pass coming out of NYCFC's defensive third and, between NYCFC's distorted defensive line and a flat diagonal from Sacha Kljestan to Bradley Wright-Phillips, they stuffed the mistake straight down their throats. That theme carried through the game until the Red Bulls came out 4-1 winners.